33 Reflections for my 33rd Birthday

1. Stop saying yes when you really mean to say no.


2. Stick to your non-negotiables. This includes jobs, friends, morning routines, and bedtimes.


3. Everyone will not wish you well. Do not waste your energy on the haters.


4. Chasing a salary will not bring you the kind of happiness you think it will.


5. Don’t try to hold on to something that has already had its season.


6. You can only change yourself.


7. Family isn’t about biology. It can, and sometimes should be created.


8. Women supporting women is essential to the growth of humanity. Don’t be a bitch. Literally.


9. Work is only one aspect of your life. It’s not your identity.



10. DO NOT get married in your 20s. You have no idea how you’ll both evolve.


11. Take opinions with a grain of salt. People tend to give advice based on their own fears and insecurities, not necessarily what’s best for you.


12. Recovery is sometimes more important than working out. There. I said it.


13. If someone is different on the internet than they are in real life- RUN AWAY.


14. Boasting about how hard you work or how little sleep you get is stupid.


15. Save your money.


16. Obsessing over your body is one of the easiest ways to negatively affect your mental health. Treat your body well, and let the rest go.


17. Marie Kondo. That is all.


18. Failure will never not be a thing. It’s a precursor to success. Find a way to work with it vs. spending time trying to avoid it.


19. It’s ok to be afraid. It’s not ok to let fear cripple you into inaction.


20. You cannot gain an appreciation for humanity without travel.


21. Be obsessed with your own growth.


22. If something/ someone doesn’t feel right, it ain’t.


23. Pay attention to your consumption, and I don’t just mean food.


24. FUCK YOUR EXCUSES.


25. Don’t undervalue yourself. Especially as a woman. Especially as a black woman.


26. If anyone tries to touch your hair or skin, punch them in the face immediately. They should know better.


27. Death should make you want to LIVE- with a capital L.


28. The state of your mental health will determine the state of everything else in your life. Make sure your mind, body, and soul are your first priority.


29. Meditation will unlock a new level of being.


30. Prioritize your time. It’s something you can’t get back.


31. Just because you have a phone doesn’t mean people should have direct access to you 24/7. Set boundaries.


32. No, you shouldn’t have to be the representative for all black people. But the reality is, you may be the only black person people have access to. Find a way to reconcile this.


33. Love makes you smile from the inside out. It makes you uncomfortable. It forces growth. It’s a catalyst for change. It’s communication. It’s service. It’s fluid. It’s essential.

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